Top 3 Ways to Support a Loved One with IBD

If you care for someone with inflammatory bowel disease, they may have needs you’re not aware of.

Living with ulcerative colitis or Crohn’s disease has its share of ups and downs. If your loved one has IBD, you probably already know that the disease can be unpredictable and includes both periods of flares and good health.

Because my son has Crohn’s disease, I’ve learned that sometimes he needs emotional support as well as practical help.

Here are some thoughtful ways you can support your loved one through the ups and downs:

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1. Listen well

People with IBD may be hesitant to share about their health unless they know it will be met with understanding and empathy. It’s important to ask your loved one how they are feeling from day to day and respond without judgment.

Try to avoid giving advice or talking about yourself. Being a good listener is one of the best ways to offer emotional support.

Try asking the following questions:

• What is your biggest challenge in terms of your health right now?
• How is your energy level today?
• How would you rate your pain?
• How have you been sleeping?

Follow up with a statement such as:

• I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
• That must be tough.
• I’m here for you.
• I’m proud of you for persevering through this.

These statements validate what your loved one is going through and let them know you care.

2. Lend a hand

If your loved one has been feeling ill, think about what you can take off their plate so they can rest. Offer to:

Grocery shop or prepare food

Keep in mind that many people with IBD follow a special diet, so ask what works for them.

Even something simple can be a big help. For example, when my son was in a flare, his grandmother brought him a pan of roasted potatoes every week. This small gesture made his weekly meal prep much easier.

Assist with physical labor

In addition to digestive issues, IBD can cause severe fatigue. Any task that requires physical energy may be challenging for someone who is in a flare.

Offer to assist with chores like yard work or cleaning. If your loved one has kids, ask how you can help with child care.

3. Help with healthcare

Whether your loved one is in a flare or feeling well, they still have to make and attend appointments as well as communicate with their insurance company, pharmacy, and doctors. These tasks can be time-consuming and mentally draining.

To lighten their mental load, you can:

Accompany them to doctor’s appointments

Help them think of questions before the appointment and take notes during the appointment to help them remember important points.

Drive them to and from colonoscopies

Since people with IBD need regular colonoscopies, this will be an ongoing need. Due to the anesthesia used during the procedure, they cannot drive themselves.

Assist with phone calls

The phone calls about pharmacy orders, insurance questions, or medical bills can seem never-ending. You may not be able to speak for your loved one unless they give the appropriate permission, but you can help them ask for the right personnel and wait on hold for them.

The takeaway

Listening well, helping with chores, and assisting with healthcare needs are all ways to support your loved one with IBD.

Even small gestures can bring cheer and encouragement to a tough time and remind your loved one that they’re not alone. A supportive community goes a long way in helping someone with IBD feel well and stay well.